Sittin Waitin Wishin: 2014 Kia Rio

"Jonathon Klein" (jonathon-klein)
06/04/2014 at 10:34 • Filed to: Sittin Waitin Wishin, Oppo Reviews

Think of a Reliant Robin. It tips over constantly. It offers no safety whatsoever. It's cheaper than dirt, as long as you don't take into account the constant repair and hospital bills you would incur. And is probably one of the worst cars on the planet. Right? Wrong. I give you the Kia Rio.

I'm so sorry for showing you that. I'll just show myself out now….You know what I can't, I need to tell you about this car. It's my journalistic duty to showcase the horrors that I sometimes encounter. So let's get this over with. Honestly, when I walked up to the Kia booth, I completely thought they had stopped making the Rio a long time ago. I figured this car went away when they started to build nicer, better-equipped cars. When I saw it on the stage, I thought they had brought it out just to showcase how far they have come in the last few years. But it actually had a window sticker! It is still in production!

How can they keep making this thing? Do people buy it? Why do they buy it? What makes a person decide to spend their money on this hateful thing? These are questions I need to know, but at the moment, I have no answers. Only more questions. But let's get to the interior if we must since this is Sittin Waitin Wishin.

UGH. Why? Why? Why? Why? This is one of the worst cars I have ever actually sat in, and I've sat in cars without an interior before. The fit and finish of this car is frankly horrific. Everything is manually operated. In a time where there are fully electric cars, manually operated windows and door locks should be a thing of the past. Yet, here they are on a brand new car.

The passenger seat and driver seat aren't on the same mechanism's, meaning that the passenger seat can go a full 2in's lower than the drivers seats for some unknown reason. Do short people drive these cars? Are their passengers giants? Is this a car for the people from TLC's Freakshow? I don't know! All I could do was shake my head in disgust at this atrocious piece of transportation. While sitting in the car, my wife said that she felt like it was a kit car, where they just gave you pieces and then you put it together in your garage. She said it should have rather been named the Kia Build-a-Bear.

What made the fit and finish worse was, directly in front of the Rio was the brilliant looking Stinger concept! The two cars could not have been further apart. In addition, it's not like Kia can't make a decent feeling car. The K900 is an awesome machine and highlights what they could do when they actually care about a product. Literally, every piece of this car feels cheap. The door handles, the seats, the visors, the doors themselves, you would get more of a quality feeling in a Russian Gulag.

What is interesting about this car, if there is anything interesting, is the print on the thousand buttons that are strewn about the interior. On all of the buttons, the font size is massive. It's as if Kia was directly targeting elderly individuals. You know the ones that go for that flip cell phone that has enlarged numbers on it, the Jitterbug. But no elderly person is going to buy this car. Not because of the quality issues, not because of the terrible looks, but because of all the buttons that are actually in this car! They may be labeled nice and big, but there are way too many for an old person to be comfortable with. Especially on the steering wheel. There are two buttons alone for the voice command features. Why? Who knows.

Then there is this lovely hole in the dash. It's not an ash tray. It's not a glovebox. It's not even a place to put your spare change. It's just a hole. It doesn't even fit your iPhone! There is no reason for it at all, but Kia still put it in there anyways. Maybe you could store part of an uneaten sandwich.

I'll keep this review brief, just because of the heinous nature of this car. It sucks. Don't buy it. If you see one on the road, stop that person, ask them why they bought it, then come back and tell me why! There is no reason for this car, it's just plain awful.

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DISCUSSION (23)

Aya, Almost Has A Cosmo With Toyota Engine Owned by a BMW. > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 10:36

You never drove the old rio. Go drive the old one an dthis will feels like a Rolls-Royce

Maddox Kay > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 10:37

Kinja'd!!!

That shifter is just hideous. It looks like a toy with that giant button sticking out of the side.

dinobot666 > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 10:37

Hey, it's a penalty box. It's not going for award winning interior accoutrements, or driving dynamics. You're sitting in the wrong car if that's what you're looking for.

Jonathon Klein > Aya, Almost Has A Cosmo With Toyota Engine Owned by a BMW.
06/04/2014 at 10:39

That honestly scares me.

Jacques L' Autre > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 10:41

I quite like the lines of the Rio, and the interior can't be any worse than the super base Spectra my parents had for a bit. For what it is it looks good, maybe even better than it's sister car, the Accent.

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 10:44

In this week on Sitting Waiting Wishing: basic transportation. Apparently being poor or just wanting simple transport should be a sin...

Aya, Almost Has A Cosmo With Toyota Engine Owned by a BMW. > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 10:46

Well, i used to have a Kia Sephia.

Then one day i visit my local kia dealer to get my front brakes replaced, and as a loaner i get the 2006 kia rio. It's Hysterically bad.

It's was so bad that i rather walk to my campus which is 2km away from my flat. Even when there's a huge volcano bursting on the way along.

dinobot666 > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather
06/04/2014 at 10:50

I admire frugal forms of transportation for how basic they are. This Rio, even as supposedly terrible it is, stands up to interior standards of GM vehicles from just a few short years ago, if not even surpassing those standards.

A modern shitbox is actually a pretty decent place to be.

Jonathon Klein > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather
06/04/2014 at 10:57

It wasn't basic transportation. I like basic, this was Kia saying we know your poor and we don't care enough to give you something that's ok.

TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 11:01

Clearly you haven't tried the original Kia Rio. That was unbelievably, catastrophically, biblically terrible. Sitting inside was akin to sitting in Eeyore's bottom. Trust me, this new Rio is a vast, vast improvement.

gabbo241 > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 11:44

Did you miss the Jalopnik post about how not to write an economy car review? I rented one of these in Puerto Rico and was amazingly impressed. This car absolutely destroyed my 1997 Civic EX in every way. Great transmission, more than adequate power, cruises comfortably at 70+. Light and tossable but not a tin can on the highway.

The only strange thing was the weirdly low mounted passenger seat with no height adjustment.

There's no point in "reviewing" a car with no appreciation for the price context. And, anyway, would you really rather have a current Civic than this car?

Jonathon Klein > gabbo241
06/04/2014 at 11:52

It should destroy the Civic since it's 17yrs newer.

I have no idea what's up with the passenger seat though? And I like small cheap cars, this one just did not feel like a good small cheap car. It's probably better on the road, but this series is just my initial impressions based solely on the interiors of these cars. And I don't think I would ever buy the new Civic, I don't like the styling. But it has to be better than this, right?

gabbo241 > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 12:02

The point about the Civic is that the Rio illustrates the advances cars have made in the last 10+ years. The Rio is right along with that progression, not left behind. Is this really the "worst" car you've ever sat in? That steering wheel is quite nice if you ask me. The button tactility is superior to many other cars, and overall the IP and radio/climate panel are much more user friendly than, say, the Ford Focus or Fiesta, supposedly paragons of small car quality but really just a confused and overly stylized.

And the Civic? You must be joking. Ridiculous "touch" volume adjustment and two tier instrument panel to disguise the 4 foot deep dashboard. Nah, bro.

Plus, you haven't driven the car.

Jonathon Klein > gabbo241
06/04/2014 at 12:23

The entire series is premised on I haven't driven them. http://oppositelock.jalopnik.com/the-chicago-au…

It's probably not the worst car, but it's definitely not a good car. I haven't been in the new Civic's, is it really that bad? I sat in a bunch of small cheap cars at the show, this was by far the worst of them.

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 15:01

What else is there that's nicer for the same price? Or for than matter, what could be made for that price?

Jonathon Klein > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather
06/04/2014 at 15:56

I liked the Mazda 2, the Mirage is kinda hilarious in its simplicity. I guess your right about what else could be had for the same price. They all kinda suck. I just feel like they are trying to get something over on them.

blackchair > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 16:40

I bought mine becuase it had a manual, smart key, push start, navigation, back up camera, leather steering wheel, felt nice when sitting in it, satellite radio, power folding mirrors, and is fun to drive. Oh and it was super cheap! Couldn't get anything close for the price. It's a fun car.

J. Drew Silvers > Jonathon Klein
06/04/2014 at 20:45

The pretentiousness in this is so strong it is making me seasick. I know you're trying to make a mark in automotive journalism, but jumping out of the gate with a comparison to a car that isn't even available in your country (and I doubt you've driven) and comparing it to a car you also haven't driven doesn't make much sense to me. When I read these and it sounds like you're trying too hard to be Jeremy Clarkson, you've lost my attention and probably that of others. By all means, do what it is that you love, but if you're going to write a review like this to make a mark of attention in an industry, at least be objective and realistic about it. That's just a real-world criticism for you. Take it or feel free to ignore it.

Jonathon Klein > J. Drew Silvers
06/05/2014 at 08:20

I'll take it, don't worry about hurting my feelings. I actually prefer people picking apart my pieces so I can grow as a writer.

However, I really did feel like this when I stepped into this car, and the Robin was just a joke, I could have also used my 91 Plymouth Acclaim, I just used something that everyone actually knows.

Also since I'm not yet getting press cars and don't get to drive them, yet, this entire series is just about my impression of the interiors. See here http://oppositelock.jalopnik.com/the-chicago-au… . I keep forgetting to link it into these.

And it doesn't matter if the car is a million dollars or 13k, if the interior is shit, then it's shit. I hate the Jag XJ interior and called it out a few weeks ago. But I loved the CRZ. It's all about that initial impression with these reviews.

J. Drew Silvers > Jonathon Klein
06/05/2014 at 12:25

I read the series when it's interesting and I follow you on here, so you don't have to explain that to me. The reason I pay attention is because you said months ago that you want to grow as a writer and I wanted to see your progress. The pretentiousness hangs harder though when you reference things such as you not yet being given press cars. In all honesty, from the outside looking in, it makes your ego look inflated. It says "I'm THAT good at writing, but nobody has noticed me yet." Again, a criticism you can either take or leave from me, but you're not at the point to make those statements yet. You're an author on a feeder blog which is a great thing, (I'm an author here too) but you have much more work to do on your prose and grammar composition. Keep working on it and keep your goals man, but blanket statements of stature don't do much to draw an audience. If you love writing, keep at it, keep improving yourself, and grow your following. You won't always please everyone who reads your stuff, but don't put the cart before the horse.

That said, I'm not an authority by any means but I'm telling you all of this because of experience. I'm a part time writer but I do make an income off my own blog and have learned a ton along the way about what people respond and react to. Sometimes just one little phrase or sentence that holds no real significance to your piece can change a person's (or audience's) perception of you.

Again, I'm not being a jerk or an authority on any of the former, but I'm not afraid to give an opinion. Online or in person.

Good luck, Jonathon

Jonathon Klein > J. Drew Silvers
06/05/2014 at 12:38

Thanks, and no worries about anything. When I said I don't get press cars yet, I honestly was more looking at it as aspirational, more of where I want to be than thinking I'm the shit.

I know I need more work on my grammar, and some of my editing skills, and from my first article to some of my more recent stuff, I know I've come a long way. But I do know I have even further to go.

This was definitely more of a rant than a real review, and I could have revised it way better than I did. This series is more of my fun write ups, not too serious. But you are right, I should have done it a bit different.

J. Drew Silvers > Jonathon Klein
06/05/2014 at 13:12

You have my respect because you didn't react defensively. That's hard to find in the days when any criticism is considered "bullying". You've improved quite a bit over time. Keep it up and never slack on editing or composition just to have a submission. I learned that a few times over in the past.

m2m, apex detective > Jonathon Klein
06/06/2014 at 05:54

Eh ... don't really know what to make of this. :?

I've sat in a production-spec version and found it not really terrible. It's a little economical car that's pretty free of the pretentious shit you get with other cars. It doesn't try to convey passion and chiq like MINI or Citroën, and it just felt like a no-nonsense car to me.

Some of the minor components leave room for improvement, that I'll agree on; e.g. the adjustment wheels for the air outlets are a bit weird and ultra-cheap. Some of the buttons don't give the tactile feedback you have learned to like from VWAG. So? This is entry-level material and they're taking huge steps forwards now ...

Honestly, I'd rather drive one of these now than, say, a 2006+ Audi A3 that's built on a platform decades old. The Rio is the kind of car I consider honest cheap in that it does not try to be all wood and leather; instead it uses simple materials that will do the job without annoying the hell out of you. Calling a cheap car out for feeling cheap is a weird thing to go imo, too. It pretty much must feel cheap because it is cheap. Do you know of any car that doesn't feel cheap but is?

People should try to come up with a cheap car that's better than this ... nvm, nix the Rio and go for the Hyundai i10; try to give an actual alternative to that . Let me tell you up front that a VW Up doesn't exactly impress when you jump in expecting VW feels. ;)